Sunday, February 10, 2008

Our great escape

When we found out about Tristan on August 15th we were so devastated those first 2 weeks and unfortunately due to the circumstances our focus from August to December 3rd shifted from Tanner and Tayden to Tristan. Knowing this was going to happen we promised Tanner, back in August, that when Jesus took Tristan to heaven we would go to Disney World. We always reminded him of the trip until Tristan was born and then we stopped because the excitement now needed to be that Tristan was alive, at home with us and we needed to "live in the moment". Two days before Tristan passed away Tanner came in my room and said, "Mommy, I don't want to go to Disney World now" I said, "Why Tanner?" He said, "Because when we go that means Tristan will have passed away!" I simply said, "It's okay honey, we don't have to go if you don't want to, but let's not worry about that right now, Tristan is alive and he's with us". On the inside though, my heart sank, he was right! Well, obviously we did not know two days later, on January 27th, that Tristan would pass away as he was doing so good and seemed to be progressing. As we were making plans for Tristan's Celebration of Life service we were also trying to make plans to go to Disney World, after all we've promised Tanner since August and we did not want to go back on our word. Although we knew this was NOT the right timing financially because of all the funeral expenses and the fact that Trayc had been off work for 1 1/2 months, we had to go, we had to do what we had promised Tanner, he and Tayden deserved our undivided attention. We started praying that the Lord would provide the funds for us to go because we did not have any extra money. I admit, I was scared first because we only had days to get the money and because I just didn't see how anyone would give us money for what they might consider a vacation instead of a "healing getaway". Well, without mentioning it to anyone, only praying, the money came - we were blessed by several family members and several friends that generously contributed to our trip. And then, the biggest blessing of all, we were given (through a friends' friend) a FREE, 5 day/4 night stay in an absolutely beautiful, brand new condo on New Symrna Beach. Our entire trip was paid for and we were so blessed! Thank you to everyone who gave money for our trip that allowed our family time to be alone, away from our own surroundings and to begin the healing process.

We left on Wednesday morning and spent part of the day on the beach walking and picking up shells and letting the kids get their feet wet, on Thursday we spend the entire day at Downtown Disney, on Friday we went to Disney World from 10:00 am-11:00 pm, on Saturday we spent 5 hours at the Daytona Speedway (it was set up for the races which begin this week) so we enjoying all the activities and walked around looking at all of the drivers merchandise trucks. We left this morning and went straight to my mom's house to celebrate my grandmother's 83rd birthday and got home at 4:00 pm this afternoon. We have had a very, very special week! It was so much fun being together, laughing and making lots of new memories. As you know, I've really struggled with the night time hours because that's when I'm so sad about Tristan and lay awake crying until I finally cry myself to sleep. I guess the change of scenery was exactly what I needed. As soon as I got in bed, every night, I fell asleep immediately. I took a picture of Tristan with us so I could look at it every day, it never made me sad to look at, they were all sweet and happy thoughts, I feel like for me that's a big step as I've really struggled looking at Tristan's stuff since he passed away. These are several pictures of our trip. Picture #5 is Tanner and I standing on Main Street holding a Mickey Mouse hat that we bought and had Tristan's name put on it, this was Tanner's idea since we celebrated "Disney at our house" with Tristan on Day 17.

Please continue praying for our family as we heal, please continue to pray for me as I try to work through hard, night hours and as our family is beginning this new journey.


Anonymous said...

I am so happy your family was able to have this healing time. What a special memory for all of you. I pray for you daily and I know that God is with you.

Laurie said...

I am so happy for you to be blessed by so many for this special get away. How good did it feel to get out and feel the water on your feet at the shore and just know how much God loves you? Praying for you daily and especially at night Yvette. Loving you through this time of missing Tristan. I do too.

Love, Laurie in Ca.
PS. Tell Tanner he is the "best" in my book! Such a young man.

Dee Dee said...

I am SO glad you got to do this, that our God worked out those details. You went to Disneyworld as different people than you were, before Tristan. You took that memory of him and that
part of you that will always be different, in a good way, because you knew and loved that sweet little one. I am glad you could have this healing family time.

Chrissy said...

I love Tristan's hat. So precious and so sweet. I think of you often and continue to lift you up.

Kim ( said...

Dear Yvette,
What a blessing - this trip, your beautiful family.
I am praying for you sweet friend. Just know that please.

Kenzie Stanfield said...


I LOVE that you had such a wonderful time together on your trip. I am so thankful you were able to get some sleep and relaxation as you spent a few days away with the boys and enjoyed your family time! I have been praying continuously...

Love you so much!

Kim said...

Tayden looks SO happy in that picture with his Mickey Mouse hat! What a beautiful boy!

I know that God is bringing you great joy through Tanner and Tayden even as you miss Tristan.

Pat said...

Just a quick note before I go off to work. I am so thankfull your family had this healing and fun time away. God always meets our needs and this was a big need in your family's life at this point. What an awesome and mightly God we serve.

M said...

So thankful for your time to get away and heal as a family. Always thinking of you and praying for you!

Anonymous said...

Praise to God this trip came when it did. I am glad that you got the chance to start healing as a family in a place where there can only be smiles. I continue to pray for your family daily.

Elisabeth said...

So cute!! I loved seeing the pictures. I am so glad you guys had fun! Love you tons!

Anonymous said...

Prayers continue for your family! I'm so glad you were able to get away and enjoy time as a family! May God continue to give you the peace and strength that you need!

So Blessed said...

Praying for God's continued comfort and strength for your family...

Anonymous said...

Such beautiful photos. I LOVE the first one. I am sure Tristan was looking down on you during this special time. HUGS


Anonymous said...

LOVE all the new photos! So happy you all had a nice trip together.


amanda said...

I love hearing stories of how God provides in such special ways...I never get tired of it!!! :) What a blessing to those that were able to give to you and help provide such a wonderful time for your family. I'm so glad you went and didn't struggle at bedtime those nights away. Disney wears mama's out too! :)

amie said...

God is good and He cares about every area of our lives. And, He wants us to have fun. I am so glad you and your family got to get away. You deserved it. I just love your sweet family.

Pauline said...

Ah the beach looks so relaxing ... What awesome pictures what a great time of healing!

Jenny said...

So happy to see a post from you and soooooo very happy to hear that you all got away. What a blessing to just take a step back and relax and enjoy some much needed family time. Still praying...Jenny

The Adoption Of William said...

What wonderful picks. What wonderful healing time!

With Love and Hope,

William's Mom

Boothe Farley said...

hi yvette...
wow... what beautiful pictures and what a reminder of the strength we truly have at our disposal if only we will accept it! i know you are wading through something stronger and deeper and sometimes, more frightening than that ocean... so please know we continue to lift you and trayc and the boys up. i remember, shortly after copeland passed away, feeling like the world just kept spinning and yet, here i was, back to the same scenario i was in before she came, only this time, minus the belly and the obvious indicators that we were going to have another child. somehow it was harder to feel like no one would have even known about copeland just by looking. my heart is filled knowing that, while you all were in disney world, you were still a family of five... though our eyes can't see and our ears can't hear, no, even our minds are unable to comprehend, we know it's true: copeland, as well as all the other beautiful children the Lord has taken Home, are safe and sound and simply waiting on us now. may you be blessed tonight and all the days following... take heart, the Lord is coming!


ajc4ever said...

What a beautiful time together. Great idea. Still praying for you guys and thinking of you lots and lots.

Angela in central Ohio

Angel said...

I am so glad that you all were able to go relax, enjoy one another and just plain have fun. Been thinking and praying for you guys.


Clare Dungey said...

What a fantastic idea to go away together! Andy and I went away together after Theo died to just remember what we still have in each other. We talked about Theo every day though because he will always be a part of our lives as Tristan will always be a part of your family.

You are very blessed in your husband and children and Tanner especially, will grow up to be changed in such a positive way. This is Tristan's legacy in his life.

Thinking and praying for you still.
Clare Dungey

Anonymous said...

hi yvette. i am praying for and loving your family from afar. i wanted to share a quote from a friend of mine after the loss of her best friend in hopes of encouraging you today. i changed the name from amber to tristan "we are all in a race to see the Father's face and we can be satisfied to know Tristan beat us there." i know tristan is in the Father's presence and is in His huge loving arms.
Nicole Eaton

Pat said...


Today is Velentines and I just wanted to tell you thanks again.

Thanks for sharing Tristan and God's love for him with the rest of us.

Thanks for sharing God's love for you and your family with us.

Thanks for sharing your and your families love for Tristan.

Thanks for sharing the love that your family has for each other with the rest of us.

Most of all thanks for sharing your mommies' heart with us.

Praying for all of you.

Anonymous said...

When I read "New Smyrna Beach" my jaw dropped. I have been going there nearly every year since I was born, and for me that is my "healing place." When I walk outside there and inhale the clean air, I feel like all my anxiety and stress flows out of me when I exhale.

I'm so glad you were able to take this trip. You all needed it. Bless you! You are still in my prayers.

Rebecca said...

I'm glad you were able to take this trip. It looks like you had a good time. I'm glad. :)

I gather Tanner was glad you decided to go? What a lovely oldest son you have. :)