Saturday, August 18, 2007

Wild and silly but just what we need!

The past 4 days have been extremely hard for our family! The shock and realization that Tristan's genetic disorder is considered "incompatible with life" is just overwhelming us. We knew with me being almost 40 yrs old that there was a chance of having a baby with a genetic disorder like Trisomy 21 (Down Syndrome) but Trayc and I had agreed that we would be okay with that because that would mean that the Lord chose us to have a special-needs child, however, we did not know about Trisomy 18 (Edward's Syndrome). Would we have still tried? Absolutely! We have never been the ones in control of our children's health so why would this be any different? We have all longed for Tristan since April and now we are grieving because of the inevitable loss we will be facing in the near future. We had all been sitting on the couch talking and crying and then we went to the kitchen to eat dinner. After we prayed, Tayden, our 1 1/2 yr. old, pulls his shirt over his head so that it is resting behind his head and on his shoulders, then he puts his rubber spoon in his mouth and starts flipping it so that it's hitting his forehead and then he puts both feet on the table and starts laughing. Okay, this is not the typical dinner at our house, he has honestly never done this. Infact, we would have never, ever accepted this kind of behavior when our 11 yr. old was that age because we were so strict on everything and that included table manners. I said, "oh, if Grammy(my mom) could see you now!" we all kind of smiled, and then Tanner, our 11 yr. old, said, "You know what mommy, maybe the reason the Lord waited 10 years to send us Tayden is because He knew we'd all need him right now because he's just so wild and silly!" I said, "Maybe you're right Tanner, maybe Tayden will (without even knowing it) be the one who helps us heal during this difficult time and maybe he will keep us laughing when we really don't want to."

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