Wednesday, August 22, 2007

7 days of suffering

The past 7 days have been so difficult as our hearts are deeply saddened by knowing that our precious baby boy's life will not be all we had hoped it to be. I think when you find out you're pregnant it's natural to start thinking about who will they look like? what color will their hair be? (always my mom's first question after any of her grandchildren are born - she has natural bright red hair, so all she wants is red-headed grandchildren!), what will their personality be like?, what will they grow up to become? and yet we are not able to think like this anymore! Our thoughts have shifted greatly to, will he be the 50% that DOES make it to full-term? will he survive the delivery? will he be born alive? will he live a day, a week, a month or will he be in the less than 10% that actually DOES live to see his first birthday? what life-saving measures do we want to use if he's born alive? and the hardest of all - how do we plan the funeral of our unborn baby who is still very much alive and who kicks all the time? There are no words that anyone can say to take this pain away, however, the love, support and encouragement we have received over the past 7 days has been incredible. I know we all get so busy in our hectic lives with home, jobs, kids and extra-curricular activities, but I can tell you that we appreciate, more than I can say, the people who have STOPPED and made the phone calls, send the emails and written the cards. There have been several days that all I have been able to do is get from the bed to the couch and just sit and cry, then Trayc will bring me the mail and there's a card! This is what we have needed this past week more than anything, just love, support and encouragement from family and friends. Please continue to pray for us during this time of suffering.

Job 2:13 says: "Then Job's friends sat on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights. No one said a word to him, because they saw how great his suffering was."

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