Day 27 - He only wants his mommy

We had a rough night last night, the longest so far. Tristan's apnea monitor went off 6 times so between that and the every 3 hours for feeding, neither one of us slept. By 7:00 am I told Trayc that I needed just 1 hr. of good sleep, so we switched sides of the bed, I pulled the covers up over my head and was ready for some sleep. Well, 5 minutes into my sleep time Tristan started fussing and by 15 minutes into my sleep time he was very, very upset and crying!!!! Trayc said, "I'm trying honey", I said, "I know, but let's just switch back", He said, "He only wants his mommy". What do you think happened just as soon as I got back on my side of the bed and Tristan saw me?? Your right, he stopped crying, closed his little eyes and slept until his next feeding at 10:00 am., of course so did we, wow, what a long night! When we finally got out of bed this morning I said, "I really miss your mom, do you think we could fly her back today so we can get a few good nights of sleep, like 8-9 hrs. straight?" Trayc laughed. Seriously though, although it would be great for her to come back or my mom to stay at night, WE need to be here alone, WE need to be the ones staying up all night, WE need to be the ones taking care of Tristan - no one else, because this is all we can do for him and we do not know when the last time might be for us to have the incredible opportunity to feed him, hold him, rub his head, comfort him, change his diaper, etc. I would feel so guilty, at this point, if someone else was here helping and Tristan passed away while I was sleeping - our sleep can wait, our precious baby boy needs his mommy and daddy right now. Tristan had a great day, his coloring did not change but his apnea monitor went off 2 times. The excitement for today? Nothing! I mean nothing at all, I literally stayed in my P.J.'s all day - which was a great feeling, Trayc did a few things around the house and Tanner and Tayden played together. It was just one of those days you need to have every once in a while. We listened to Christmas music during dinner tonight and then we spent a relaxing night as a family. We are planning on getting to bed earlier than normal tonight in case we have another long night. Please pray for that Tristan's apnea monitor will not go off tonight, please pray for his continued strength and please pray for us as we face another new day tomorrow.